The Etch-A-Sketch king

whoa check out this etch a sketching, someone certainly had no friends in his yoof, all he had was himself and his trusty etch a sketch.

The Etch-A-Sketch king



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Funny comedy podcast - Hosks Half Hour


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Train surfing!

Apparently this bloke found out he had leukaemia and decided to live life to the max.
Extreme trainsurfing


wait a minute he isn’t really dead
The truth about the trainrider


Extreme Trainsurfer - death is fake


I don't really understand all the daft story, I just wanted to see someone train surfing.


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Funny comedy podcast - Hosks Half Hour


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Train surfing!

Apparently this bloke found out he had leukaemia and decided to live life to the max.
Extreme trainsurfing


wait a minute he isn’t really dead
The truth about the trainrider


Extreme Trainsurfer - death is fake


I don't really understand all the daft story, I just wanted to see someone train surfing.


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Funny comedy podcast - Hosks Half Hour


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What is Jumping the Shark?

The term jumping the shark alludes to a specific scene in a 1977 episode of the TV series Happy Days when the popular character Arthur "Fonzie" Fonzarelli jumps over a shark while water skiing. The scene was so preposterous that many believed it to be an ill-conceived attempt at reviving the declining ratings of the flagging show. Since then, the phrase has become a colloquialism used by U.S. TV critics and fans to denote the point at which the characters or plot of a TV series veer into a ridiculous, out-of-the-ordinary storyline. Such a show is typically deemed to have passed its peak. Once a show has "jumped the shark" fans sense a noticeable decline in quality or feel the show has undergone too many changes to retain its original charm.


Fonzie jumps the shark


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Hosks Half Hour - Episode 21 - Watch out for the Death cakes

Hosks Half Hour - Episode 21 - watch out for the death cakes

here is the link

This episode contains

Sketches
Morrisey is badger spotting
Mika doesn't believe in God
Capello should be sacked
old Jack

News Nugget
Man found dead after fairy cake eating competition
painting plates with breasts for charity
mp tries to ban fat bread

Stand up
Boyfriends and girlfriends are different

Hosk Story
Secret nicknames featuring pound coin boy and white seeded, not forgetting the dynamo Warlock

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Hosks Half Hour - Episode 20 - Cheeky Valentines

A new Hosks Half Hour, which is jam full of swearing, I never new I had such a potty mouth, actually it’s not me, it’s the characters in my mind, it’s the voices I tell you

http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/2008/02/hosks-half-hour-episode-20-cheeky.html


below is what's stuffed into this episode and there is some kind of swearing record this week

Hosk Story
Cheeky Tesco’s staff
Hosk turns off the lights in the toilet
Hosk finds himself under attack and there are some great big fat swans!

Standup
Subway sandwiches
Tornados are a way to pull
Valentines Day is rubbish

A terrible dad joke

News nuggets
man sinks his own boat
The mosquito to ward off hoodies
Sex with dead model was wrong
The gap year kid writing on the guardian

Sketches
We have Bruno who makes his dirty debut on Hosks Half Hour
We also regretful John who is walking in the country

Mucks and some pub talk at the end

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Hosks Half Hour - Episode 19 - imagine if genitals could talk!

There is a new episode of Hosks Half Hour and its a cracker

it contains this

We start the show with a Dad joke

We have a sketch with Gary Barlow is back and he means business.

Some hosk standup – imagine if genitals could speak

The hosk is training with the big boys in TKD but he has a few ideas up his sleeve.

News nuggets – The Spanish come up with the husband crèche, Genius. Man showing porn to his pupils. Inept Aussie robbers jailed.
A Britney Spears sketch where she goes to get her psychiatric report., We a sketch from Morrissey walking in the park and Mark E Smith goes to his local shop and buys a curly wurly but he isn’t happy with it.

The sun letters are back with some nude worries for one wife. Someone else is having sex with their aunt.

Then there is a load of fuck ups and some pub talk.

here is the link

http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/2008/02/hosks-half-hour-episode-19-imagine-if.html



enjoy and get listening


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Funny comedy podcast - Hosks Half Hour


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Grange Hill - look at the song just say no

I listened to the Grange Hill song, just say no song from the Grange Hill gang whilst recording my funny podcast Hosks Half Hour and its Grange Hill inspired episode, which can be found here

Here is the clip just focusing on the just say no song, It's funny how time makes you look back at things differently, I never realized how rubbish this song was, excluding the funky bit at the start.



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Classic Tommy Cooper Jokes

Someone sent me some Tommy Cooper jokes today and they certainly made me chuckle, I would call them dad jokes but some of them are too good for that title



Two Aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married

The ceremony was rubbish but the Reception was Brilliant.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Man goes to the docs, with a strawberry growing out of his head.

Doc says, 'I'll give you some cream to put on it.'



--------------------------------------------------------------------


'Doc, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home.'

'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.'



'Is it common?'



'It's not unusual.'



-------------------------------------------------------------------



A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.



'My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?'



'Well,' says the vet, 'let's have a look at him'



So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.



Finally, he says, 'I'm going to have to put him down.'



'What? Because he's cross-eyed? '



'No, because he's really heavy'



--------------------------------------------------------------------



'Doctor, I can't pronounce my F's, T's and H's.'



'Well you can't say fairer than that then'



------------------------------------------------------------------



Two elephants walk off a cliff...... boom boom!



---------------------------------------------------------------------
So I went to the dentist.



He said 'Say Aaah.'



I said 'Why?'



He said 'My dog's died.'
---------------------------------------------------------------------



So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said
'Who's speaking please?'



And a voice said 'You are.'
-------------------------------------------------------------------



So I rang up my local swimming baths.
I said 'Is that the local swimming baths?'



He said 'It depends where you're calling from.'
---------------------------------------------------------------------
So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.'



He said 'I'm not stopping you.'
---------------------------------------------------------------------



Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5
people in my family, so it must be one of them.



It's either my mum or my dad.
Or my older brother Colin.
Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu.



But I think it's Colin.



---------------------------------------------------------------------



So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he
said 'You've been promoted.'



And I swerved.



And then he rang up a second time and said 'You've been promoted again.'



And I swerved again.



He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.'



And I went into a tree.



And a policeman came up and said



'What happened to you?'
And I said 'I careered off the road.'



---------------------------------------------------------------------



Now, most dentists' chairs go up and down, don't they?
The one I was in went back and forwards.



I thought 'This is unusual'.
And the dentist said to me, 'Mr. Cooper, get out of the filing cabinet.'



--------------------------------------------------------------------
So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give
me a lift?'



I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'
---------------------------------------------------------------------



Two cannibals eating a clown. One says to the other



'Does this taste funny to you?'



---------------------------------------------------------------------



Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and
the other was eating fireworks.



They charged one and let the other one off.



---------------------------------------------------------------------



You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today.
They left a little note on the windscreen; it said 'Parking Fine.'



So that was nice.



---------------------------------------------------------------------



A man walked into the doctors,
The doctor said 'I haven't seen you in a long time'
The man replied, 'I know I've been ill'



---------------------------------------------------------------------



A man walked into the doctors,
he said 'I've hurt my arm in several places'



The doctor said, 'well don't go to those places'



---------------------------------------------------------------------



I had a ploughman's lunch the other day.
He wasn't very happy.



---------------------------------------------------------------------



I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I
couldn't find any.



---------------------------------------------------------------------



I bought some HP sauce the other day.
It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years.
---------------------------------------------------------------------



Two blondes walk into a building..........you'd think at least one
of them would have seen it.



--------------------------------------------------------------------



Phone answering machine message -



'...If you want to buy marijuana.............press the hash key...'



-------------------------------------------------------------------



I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he
couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.



He said, 'No, the steaks are too high.'



---------------------------------------------------------------------



My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli.



A strong currant pulled him in.



---------------------------------------------------------------------



A man came round in hospital after a serious accident.



He shouted, 'Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!'



The doctor replied, 'I know you can't, I've cut your arms off'.



---------------------------------------------------------------------



I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a mussel.



---------------------------------------------------------------------



Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly.



They lit a fire in the craft. It sank, proving once and for all that







you can't have your kayak and heat it.



---------------------------------------------------------------------
Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered
with hundreds and thousands.



Police say that he topped himself.
---------------------------------------------------------------------



Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other 'Your round.'



The other one says 'So are you, you fat slob!'



---------------------------------------------------------------------



Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small
two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery.



Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and
expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night



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Monty Pythons - The Lumberjack song

I have been watching Monty Pythons flying circus recently so I thought I would digg up the Lumberjack song. I find it funny firstly that they came up with the song and secondly that it sticks into everyones mind so much.

if you haven't heard about it then here it is in its full glory



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Standup Comedy - English Language

Here is a clip of some standup comedy about the English language, talking about some unusual aspects of it.

like saying no offence at the start of the sentence means you can offend people.

We also have a look at the statement, she was asking for it.

here is the link

The above link was a clip from the Hosks Half Hour which is the funniest podcast on the internet, so go check it out


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Stand up comedy - dieting makes you put weight on!

I bet if you looked up some figures that 70 percent of the world was on a diet and the other 30 percent have probably given up because they are too fat.

Here is some stand up/observation humour on dieting and the fact people often put on weight when dieting rather than actually losing it.

here is a link to the file

This clip was taken from Hosks Half Hour, which is a comedy podcast that is well worth tuning into because its full of stuff like the clip above.


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pictures of ladies bottoms

here are some pictures of every day women clothed but the pictures are of their bottoms, sometimes a bit of mystery makes it all the more exciting.







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sexy picture of Elisha Cuthbert

I have never really watched 24 but I have seen some nice pictures of Elisha Cuthbert and she looks mighty fine, its almost a reason in itself to start watching 24.

so if you like Elisha Cuthbert and you like bikinis then these pictures will be right up your alley







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Hosks Half Hour - episode 18 - Evolution and receding chins

Its friday so it's time for another excellent episode of Hosks Half Hour and this weeks episode of Hosks Half Hour is very funny.

It has some good news nuggets about being handcuffed and naked in a strip joint and has a humorous look at evolution and what might occur in the future.

here is the link

http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/2008/02/hosks-half-hour-episode-18-evolution.html



and here is the description of this weeks episode


Some news nuggets on what names conjure up images of huge tackles and little tackles. Amusing Hosk stories on being ill and his rubbish old car. News nuggets see an Australian MP3 telling a story about his adventure in a strip joint. Hosks has a look an article about Human Evolution in the future and how we will split into one lot will be a group of fat goblins and the others will be giant healthy bunch. So I develop my Hosking 3 Knobs theory!

News Nuggets talk about paper pants! We have a sketch with Morrisey from the Smiths telling us about his life. Hosks car is in the car doctors. We also have Derick the Aussie Agony aunt dealing out some advice. Hosk tells the listeners about Man Flu.

There is some stand up comedy about bad advice, stupid questions and dilemmas. We finish off with some mucks and pub talk.


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Funny comedy podcast - Hosks Half Hour


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Deathstar Cafeteria

Eddie Izzard hasn't been funny for years now but I heard this sketch and it reminded me of how funny he used to be. I saw his last stand up show, sexy or something like that and it was really unfunny, apart from him saying "IN MY MIND". He should stop being in films and start doing comedy again.

I can't tell if this is new or old but either way its classic comedy from Eddie Izzard.
Deathstar Cafeteria


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Funny Video - Ninja video - my sugar

A comedy video from children's TV masters, Trevor and Simon doing a Ninja sketch. I didn't realise it was them to start with and it surprisingly funny.


my sugar


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Dentist feels 25 women breasts whilst treating teeth

I read an article about a doctor who used Chest massages to treat womens dental problems. He manages to get his way through quite a number as well before anyone complains

Here is a link the audio file about the shocking tale


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Funny picture - spot the fox

here is a great comedy picture and also has some great advice



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Think before you click on Valentine's Day

I heard on the radio today warning people to be careful about sending valentines cards because there have been 13 cases of people sueing the person who sent the card for sexual harrassment. Then I also read this below warning people about sending E Valentines cards. You can't do anything these days, below is the article from this website

I say chill out and let the love out


E-card distributors have been blasted for encouraging the irresponsible use of email systems by offering anonymous Valentine's Day messages.
Written by Ian Lynch

E-card distributors have been blasted for encouraging the irresponsible use of email systems by offering anonymous Valentine's Day messages.
The messages are a real turn off for internet security company Activis, which regards the use of attachments from unknown sources as highly dangerous to corporate networks. Both Easypostcard.com and pres.net are allowing users to send email messages anonymously.

John Cheney, managing director of Activis, said: "On Wednesday morning staff are likely to be overeager to open emails expecting to receive a message of love from an anonymous admirer. This is the perfect opportunity for viruses masquerading as Valentine's Day messages to strike."

"These irresponsible websites are actually encouraging people to send anonymous emails which are putting companies' networks in serious danger. Company directors must take immediate action and reiterate their email usage policy, stressing the dangers of opening email attachments from an unknown source," he explained.
"Just because it's Valentine's Day email users still need to 'think before they click'. The problem is that you can never tell what damage an attachment will do until you've opened it - and by then it's too late," he added.

Pres.net denied that they were being irresponsible. A spokeswoman told vnunet.com: "Our messages are sent within the body of an email. A user would have to go out of their way to send them as an attachment."

However, Easypostcard.com's message service could only be sent as an attachment.


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Film Myths - there is something in your eye

Here is a funny piece of audio busting the myth of having something in your eye as a way to pull ladies.

having something in your eye is not sexy and never will be

Here is the link


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You'll Get Crabs!

I read this article on here

and it talks about the favourite phrase of 2008, yes, I know its still early but we do have an early leader with "You'll get crabs!" and when someone says that to you, you really should listen

here is the article


"You'll Get Crabs!" Early Favorite Phrase Of 2008
BOSTON (CAP) - Well, the preliminary voting is done, and unlike the race for the Democratic presidential nomination, there appears to be a clear-cut favorite for most popular catch-phrase of 2008. According to exit polls conducted by the Cliche Writers Of America, "You'll get crabs!" is well on its way to cementing its place in the American lexicon.

"The phrase was first overheard by one of our members at a keg party in late 2007," said CWA President Clive Robard. "A young woman offered the warning to a friend of hers as she snuck into the bedroom with a young man.

"By the time the party concluded some hours later, the catch phrase had been uttered literally hundreds of times, covering every conceivable topic from someone picking their nose to someone who ate a cheese curl that fell on the floor," added Robard.
While there's no easy way to put a dollar value on catch phrases, the CWA does plan to register the sentence with the U.S. Patent Office on behalf of the woman who first spoke the words, Boston University sophomore Alexa Hartman. That way if Budweiser does go through with its plans to build an ad campaign around the phrase, the 20-year-old woman will be justly compensated.

"Budweiser, Kotex, Fox News - whoever it is, we just want to make sure she gets paid," said Robard.

Robard said the great thing about the new phrase is that it is versatile enough to be used both in serious situations as well as times when someone couldn't possibly contract the sexually transmitted disease. Unlike the early favorite of 2007, "No, that's my foot!" which lost out to eventual winner, "Don't tase me, bro!" Robard feels this year's phrase will have a long shelf life.

"I think we benefited a lot from the Hollywood writers' strike," said Robard. "Where we usually get favorite phrases from professionals paid to write them, this year we got one from a college coed jealous that her friend was about to get some.
"Unintentional, off the cuff, and pure gold," said Robard. "It's what catch phrases are all about."


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Funny Podcast - Hosks Half Hour

If you like comedy in your podcasts then check out this podast Hosks Half Hour - http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/

The podcast features stand up observational humour, sketches, news nuggets, funny stories and jokes. What more could you want. Unlike other funny podcasts it is just one man, talking into mic, so it doesn't suffer from two people chatting about nothing. It's 30 minutes long, although sometimes runs over. Here is a description of this weeks episode

Grange Hill is closing down

This episode contains news about Grange Hill, the theme tune, clips from the classic song Just say No and a rubbish sketch about Grange Hill. It has stand up about Doctors, We have Hosk Stories about going to the Doctors and lots more. We bust the myth of helping people with things in their eye. A sketch about the forthcoming recession and a clip from the Social scientist investigates Hoodies. We have a virtual haircut clip sent in by one of the readers, news nuggets about the new tough rules laid down by England manager Capello. Finally we have the fuck ups and some pub talk which reappears after a long time off.

here is the link

http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/2008/02/hosks-half-hour-episode-17-grange-hill.html

below are a few more amusing episodes which show the different topics covered in the podcast why not try my Tenerife special - Tenerife Uncovered

http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/2008/02/hosks-half-hour-episode-16-tenerife.html

or the week before was a tribute to Jeremy Beadle

http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/2008/02/hosks-half-hour-episode-15-tribute-to.html

or an old podcast about how griefing can be so funny

http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/2007/12/hosks-half-hour-episode-9-who-would.html

Here is the show dedicated to the internet legend - Leeeeeroy Jenkins

http://hoskshalfhour.blogspot.com/2007/12/hosks-half-hour-episode-10-leeroy.html

I hope you enjoy the shows and become a regular listener

Cheeer

Hosky

YOU SAY WE PAY SPOOF

This is a great little gag from Adam Buxton from the Adam and Joe show.

its seems to sum up the stupidness of the contestants and the show excellently

YOU SAY WE PAY


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"Toking" with Lawrence Welk

This is how they use to sing songs about drugs old School style, smiling with women on your knee, yeah baby

"Toking" with Lawrence Welk


and all I can say about this clip is, look at them go!

The Bearded Clambake - Back That Ass Up Lawrence Welk

Funny Audio - Who was Slim Pickins?

Who is Slim pickins, well I have found out and you can read about him here

for a quick summary he was a cowboy who took on the name but to find out more listen below

or you can listen to it in a comedy style here

The clip was taken from Hosks Half Hour which is a comedy podcast which is full of stuff like that, so go check it out on the link below if like Oliver Twist you find yourself saying, please Sir can I have some more.


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Funny comedy podcast - Hosks Half Hour


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Sexy pictures of Angelina Jolie

if you like hot pictures of Angelina Jolie look sexy then this is the blog post for you. I have always like Angelina Jolie but she isn't always playing sexy roles, except maybe in Lara Croft, which I also have some pictures of here

enjoy the hot pictures of Angelina







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Pictures of Britney Spears looking hot

remember when Britney Spears wasn't a nutter and she a chart topping superstar who looked hot.

Here are some pictures of Britney looking hot, in bikinis and on stage. So if you are a fan of Britney Spear and like looking at pictures of Britney look hot and Britney looking sexy then feast you eyes on the meal below.








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Get yourself a Virtual Haircut

why don't you get yourself a virtual haircut, yes it sounds wierd but why don't you try it for yourself

sit, back and relax. you need sound for this


http://www.bwebcentral.com/blog/2/334

this is was also sent in by a listener to Hosks Half Hour so it must be good.


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Funny comedy podcast - Hosks Half Hour


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Cave Miners the game brought to life

Do you remember the classic game Cave Miners, well here it is brought to life. I always think it would be amusing to do sketches about computers games because we never really stop to think about how fucked up computer games are, things like Italian plumbers jumping on Giant mushrooms, its all weird dude.

but its also funny, enjoy



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look at my bicep

I saw this terrible stand up and it made me laugh, especially when he starts shouting, look at my bicep, you saying I can't pull women with Biceps like these

bicep

Biceps from Peter Berkman on Vimeo.

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