they are in no order and there are some classics, these are some of the pages I looked at to generate the list below
http://www.bbc.co.uk/northyorkshire/competitions/2004/12/15/rapidough/pressies.shtml
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/talking_point/1710897.stm
yahoo answers the question
http://malaysia.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071125055258AAhw32G
http://forums.commercialsihate.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=9539&PID=120117
Someone donated $1000 in my name to Childrens Hospital. Damn if that didn't make me angry. Totally thoughtless and selfish. I got them back next year by donating a muskrat in their name to a village in Appalachia.
My "ex" bought me a Star. Yes, you can "buy" a star up in outter space and you recieve a map with "your" star plotted on it.
"Gee, thanks. Now if I only had a telescope to view it with."
The first Christmas my husband and I had together (that we were married) he gave me a car air freshener, the kind that hangs on the rear view mirror.
I got a car air freshener a while back as a gift, too! But, instead of jasmine or rose or some such scent, it was "Sizzlin' Bacon". Smelled great! I just took it down, as it no longer smells.
I once donated a goat to an African village in my sis-in-law's name. That was her Christmas present in 2005.
My grandmother gave me a headband with a peace sign glued to it. In 2004. I don't know what era she thought we were living in, but she probably had it since 1969, unearthed it, and slapped it in a box.
My Grandmother crochet, for me, the most hideous poncho ever to be witnessed in this world, it was HUGE, purple, long and had pom poms dangling from it!!! I was wearing a back brace at the time which added to the effect. My Mom made me wear it to church and I thought I would DIE of embarrassment!!!
Instead of ploughing through the shopping malls and department stores, I decided to make several copies of a photograph that I had taken of a particular dilapidated farmhouse in California and frame them as gifts to family members. The remarks that I received indicates that this was perhaps one of the best gifts that I have given. I find that the best sort of gift is that which contains a bit of one's self within it. It's something that can't and will not be exchanged on Boxing Day (or the day after Christmas here in the colonies).
I awoke on Christmas morning this year to find both of my upper brows sadly defunct of any hair! I'd bought my wife, Sharston, a spanking fancy 'Ladies-Shave'. My little boy Adrian and only gone and found this and proceeded to crop all evidence of any eyebrows I wished to have had on Christmas day! Suffice to say Christmas dinner was a slightly subdued affair!
Who on earth would give a genuine leather coat to a vegan? A stranger, maybe! But mine came from an old, old friend who thought she was buying me a really elegant present. Next year, she got sick and herself became a vegetarian
I was given a handsome but visibly used hair comb by a well-meaning but slightly dotty aunt.
My worst present this year and possibly ever was from my wife - a small bag of polished stones, the type that go in dry arrangements Lovely, just what I always wanted !
A 3 pack of brown Yfronts - I wouldn't have minded but I'm female.
My mother in law bought me a farting gnome for some obscure reason a few years back. I didn't have the heart to say anything so he was thrown away a few weeks later.
A bag of grapes, just the one, with a Buy-One-Get-One-Free sticker on it!!
A lighter ... with a flame that makes a blow torch look like a candle. The flame gushes from an opening beak in a birds head as the eyes flash red and the words "I love you" are squeaked at a volume easily audible over a road drill.
Painted Bones. My Mother in Law went to the butcher and got some left over bones which she painted brown and gave to me for Xmas as knucklebones. They smelt really bad. I am a 30 year old female and what she thought I was going to do with some stinky painted bones is a mystery.
I have had all the usual dodgy gifts over the years from odd smelling aftershaves and novelty socks but the worst EVER had to be from my grandmother a few years back. She bought me a boot bag to keep my football/rugby boots in. Not a bad gift at first but then I have been in a wheelchair for the last 12 years and disabled practically all my life! I said thanks of course but laughed my head off and have never told her to save her feelings.
FLAMING MAD! a yucky faded pink and brown candle, when lit the flame shot four foot in the air.... my whippet and greyhound ran for their lives and i fetched the water.. i found out that my mums neighbour who gave the the damn thing had kept it in her attic for years and years.
When I was 14 (many years ago) my aunt & uncle bought me a lone ranger mask & a matching snake belt, it was the worst present I had ever received. Today's youngsters will not appreciate how bad this present was.
My grandmother once bought me a toilet bell, if someone tried the door you had to ring once for a number 1 (wee) and twice for a number 2!!!
Black Balaclava. I asked my husband to surprise me with some nice clothes,I was really excited.i could not believe he bought me a black balaclava with the eye holes cut out, he said it was to keep my ears warm. He is now my ex!!!!!
A Cliff Richard album from my now ex-husband. I hate Cliff Richard, but ex-husband's PREVIOUS wife was a big Cliff fan...
a microwave browning dish !
I'd asked for a watch and my husband bought 5 litres of engine oil and gave me the free plastic one that came with...I didn't speak to him all Christmas.
A bag of pegs from my husband - brightly coloured plastic ones not even the wooden type.
Princess Tina Ballet Book and I never did ballet!!!
Not MY worse present (thank goodness), but years ago I used to wrap presents for my Nan - and one year she gave my cousin a 'Guiness Book Of World Records' (which was 12 years out of date) and a ''Join The Dots'' puzzle book, with half of the book completed!
I received a rape alarm from my grandmother with the words "I hope you get some use out of it". A cheery Christmas gift if ever there was one!
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